SimCity - City Park
A luxurious park full of beautiful trees and peaceful pools, this park
was a gift by the Mayor of SimCity to the citizens, a place for them
all to relax. As a contrast to the industrial mess on the other side of
town, this place is idyllic, birds and llamas frolicking in the glades.
There's very little crime here, and the place is generally considered
safe, even after dark.
SimCity is such a peaceful place. The only crime known to affect the
residents directly is burglary, and even that is rare. Because public
theft is unheard of, the park has quite a nice barbecue available for
public use. And you'll only need one guess who's hogging it.
Yes, it's Mario, the plumber with a podgy belly the most best damn
mustache this side of the Ultimate Warp Zone. He's wearing his 'Kiss-a
the Chef' apron while he's bbq-ing...pasta. How the hell he can do that
is beyond logic, but so is Mario. You can't be that fat and be able to
jump four times your height from a standing start without defying logic
just a little bit.
Barbecue? Bah! That's not a barbecue! When the Koopa King heard the
people of Sim City were having a barbecue, he felt he had to go school
them on the subject.
Besides, those happy-go-lucky, mindless Sims tick him off, and he takes
any opprotunity to rain on their parade.
"INCOMING!" Comes a ferocious voice from the sky, as Bowser comes
crashing down into the center of the park. He must have ridden his
Koptor here, since there's no sign of the Doom Ship in the skies. "You
runts want a /BARBECUE/? I'LL show you a BARBECUE!" It doesn't take a
genius to figure out what he's talking about. Bowser begins breathing
fire every which way, rather chaotic, really.
At this point he hasn't even NOTICED Mario.
Bowser certainly makes himself well known to the area as he crashes
down from above, then starts setting fire to everything in sight. Mario
doesn't waste a second, not even turning off the barbecue to stop his
pasta from burning, nor does he take off his apron, but it's not long
enough to catch his feet anyway. Pulling out his hammer from god knows
where, he leaps towards Bowser, holding his hammer with his left hand.
"Bowser! Why-a do you have-a to ruin everyone's-a fun?" He's lacking a
certain Ultra Dousing Device, so there's not much he can do to stop the
fires. But, he /can/ stop the source of them.
"G'huh?" Bowser grunts as he hears a certain annoying voice coming from
behind him. Grrr... "Mario!" The King of the Koopas spins around to
face his eternal foe. "Me ruining fun? Gwahahaha! Look at Mr.
Hypocrite! You're the one always ruining MY fun! Well not today!"
Bowser leaps high into the air, taking a deep breath he sends a wave of
fire towards the ground below. The park's about to become an inferno if
Mario doesn't hurry and do something.
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Fire Wave attack!
Mario's brow closes to a frown at the Koopa, before backflipping out of
the path of the fire. "You have a crazy way-a of having fun!" he
retorts, before he even gets back to his feet. Holding his hammer out,
he holds out his other arm and stands on one foot, before spinning
around like a top. He starts to move off to the right as he gets faster
and faster, but then he suddenly stops, throwing the hammer directly at
Bowser, and not in the typical overarm style. Should Bowser still be
spewing fire, he could fight himself effectively gagged by mallet, or
at least with a loose fang.
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
Around and Around-a She Goes weak attack!
King Bowser's fire breathing comes to a quick halt as he suddenly has a
face-full of hammer. "SNARFLE?" He gags in surprise, before spitting
the non-edible item out. "Bwargh! Way to play dirty, plumber-boy! I
suppose you won't mind it if I do too? Not that I've never had to ask
before, bwahahaha!"
No, he's never had to ask before. Or rather, it's that he's never
bothered. But this time he's at least given Mario fair warning. So
that's kind of /like/ consideration. "Try these on for size!" He
shouts, taking out some of his OWN hammers and flinging them in Mario's
direction. It's not just one or two, either, it's a literal STORM of
hammers.
King Bowser strikes Mario with his
Stop! Hammer Time! attack!
No sooner has he thrown his hammer, Mario is on the attack, charging
towards Bowser. But his offensive is brought to a swift halt as a storm
of hammers descends, causing him to make a shaprish retreat. He's
almost out of Bowser's throwing range when one of them clonks him on
the back of the head, which in turn leads to him falling over and
skidding in the ashes of the grass. Rubbing the back of his head, he
picks himself up again, turning to face the evil Koopa. "Well how-a
else do I stop-a you from-a torching this-a park, Bowser?" Since he's
not quite suicidal enough to rush back into the hammers, Mario thrusts
his right palm towards Bowser, before just as many fireballs as
Bowser's hammers fly out.
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
Stop! Fireball Time! attack!
Way to rip off his schtick, Mario! "Ow! Ow ow ow ow! OW!" Bowser roars,
jumping to the side to avoid the fireballs, but stopping his own hammer
barrage at the same time. "Again with the fireballs. WHEN are you gonna
learn that /I'm/ the one that does fire better?"
To show this, Bowser takes a deep breath. A deep deep breath. Mario
should know what's coming, but the question is... can he get out of the
way. Just as Bowser finishes his big inhalation a bright light can be
seen shining on the back of his throat. This is your cue. At that very
moment Bowser breathes an enourmous, and fast-moving, fire-ball. Aimed
RIGHT for Mario's big noggin.
King Bowser misses Mario with his My
Fire Is Mightier attack!
Mario knows what's coming alright, and he knows just what to do. While
Bowser is busy with his breathing exercises, Mario charges again for
Bowser. Just as the Koopa King fires the snotball from hell, Mario
makes his famous *boing* and leaps right over his enemy's head. Now
Bowser should be the one to guess what's coming. Mario reaches out with
those grubby gloved hands of his for that tail, before trying to grab
hold.
Unless the King is just as wised up as his nemesis is, Mario would then
start to spin the large hulk that is Bowser around and around and
around. But alas, instead of bombs being around here, there are houses
and trees and children. So, instead, Mario would use the momentum he's
got from spinning to pull the Koopa King over his shoulder and smash
him into the ground. They say that when the animal's done a bad thing,
you should rub it's nose in it.
Mario misses King Bowser with his I
Reject Your Fire And Substitute My Throw attack!
Poor Mario. Bowser is PREPARED for the tail-grab this time. "Gwahaha!
NOW I gotcha, you cheeky
plumber!"
Before Mario can begin spinning Bowser around, the Koopa King drops his
hands to the ground to get a good bit of traction, then begins...
wagging his tail. No, seriously. This isn't a pleasent 'happy to see
you' wag, this is a furious 'GET OFFA ME' wag. Hopefully Bowser builds
up enough momentum to shake Mario off... and hopefull toss him into
something hard and blunt.
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Tail Wag attack!
When Bowser's bulk fails to move, Mario prepares for trouble. But,
before Bowser can shake him off, the plumbing Hero has already let go.
Backflipping away from his arch rival once more, he takes a moment to
notice that his apron is all black, probably from when he kissed the
floor after being smacked with a hammer. This does not make him a happy
plumber. Reaching behind his apron, he pulls out a Super Feather,
before surrounding it with his fist and his trademark yellow cape
appearing from his back. Running back towards Bowser, he jumps into the
air, but not to fly. He's times it so that he's at Bowser's face height
when he's right in front of Bowser's face. Why? So he can smite
Bowser's snout with the cape.
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
One (1) Smiting weak attack!
Smack Smack Smack Smack Smack! The cape does little damage, aside from
making his snout fairly sore. Seeing that he no longer needs to be on
the ground Bowser stands back up, still smirking. Clearly he must have
something up his sleeve. "So you want to play at spinning, eh Mario?
Well I can 1-Up you HERE too! Gwahaha!"
Leaping into the air again, Bowser pulls all four of his limbs, and his
head, into his shell, which begins spinning rapidly as it descends
towards Mario. It's a heavy shell, too, so it falls rather quickly.
Move fast Mario!
King Bowser strikes Mario with his
Spinning Shell Bomb attack!
As Bowser is aided by gravity back to ground level, Mario has a slight
panic as he stumbles while trying to run away. Bad move, because then
the huge, heavy shell soon finds itself right on top of Mario. Is this
the end of the plumber, death by squish. Far from it. Bowser might here
a faint noise as Mario uses another power up, before burrowing out from
under the Koopa King. What did he use? Well, none other than a Super
Carrot. Yes, that's right, a carrot. Complete with bunny ears sticking
out of his cap. Mario takes a moment, to dust himself off, before
crouching down, and then bouncing around all over the place, trying to
keep Bowser off guard. He'd then suddenly leap right for the Koopa's
cranium, and jump on it when he least expects it. Repeatedly.
Mario misses King Bowser with his
Ker-Bounce x Lots smash attack!
Bowser moves quick as he lands. He feels Mario move out from underneath
him, so he doesn't waste any time coming out of his shell and getting
the heck out of the way. His instincts were right, too, as he narrowly
dodges Mario's smash. Bowser seems to be on a lucky streak.
"You're off your game, Mario! I don't think I've ever seen you this
sloppy. It's sad, really. We all knew you would eventually lose your
edge. But I'll always be sharp!" And he decides to illustrate that
point in a painful way, by leaping into the air again as if he were
ready to body-slam Mario. But as he begins to descend, he flips over,
bringing his spikey back downard. This.... could be very painful. "Dig
your way outta this one, bunny-man!"
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Spiked Shell Slam smash attack!
Although his stomp missed, Mario still had a heck of a lot of momentum
left over. "You-a wouldn't be-a so hot if you'd just-a come back from
vacation!" he shouts back, before jumping up once more, but this time
his ears flap like mad, as he hovers out of the way of Bowser's shell.
He's used two power ups in this battle alone, so he's just going to
have to deal with looking like the easter bunny. Landing once more, he
leaps directly at and over Bowser again, and grabs for something. What
did he grab for? The tail? Nope. The ankle. Not as long or as easy to
grab, but still just as good for throwing...into the duck pond.
Mario misses King Bowser with his
Bower Go Fish attack!
"Wouldn't I?" Bowser scoffs. "Why don't you ask your friend, Runt Link,
then? The day I got back from MY vacation I pounded his little green
face from one end of MacBeth to the other! The punk shoulda known
better than to make fun of my darling daughter. I made him pay for it!
Bwahaha!" Remembering this incident, though, gets Bowser a little
ticked. Link wasn't the only one, Bowser also needs to remember to beat
Samus into the ground as well for HER comments. Buncha unscrupulous
misfits.
Mario makes a fatal mistake in grabbing Bowser's leg. He forgot that
his legs are FAR stronger than his tail. His limb doesn't budge. Or,
not until he WANTS it to, anyway. "Aren't YOU grabby today? Get lost!"
He says, before rearing his leg back and booting Mario square in the
face.
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Boot To Da Head attack!
Seems like Bowser doesn't want to be thrown today. Although Mario was
able to bend over backwards to avoid a large and smelly koopa foot in
his face, the claws catch the tip of his hat, resulting in his bunny
ears vanishing with his well known 'power down' noise. Leaping back
again from Bowser, Mario can be seen to be sweating slightly, with a
worried look on his face. This doesn't seem to be going well for him
right now. Clutching his right hand into a fist, he leaps once more for
the Koopa King, but this time not going to jump over him or to pounce
on his head. Instead, he opens his fist, revealing a fireball, which he
quickly throws at Bowser's head hair.
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
Your-a Hair is on Fire weak attack!
Sniff sniff. "Hey, what's burning?" Bowser innocently asks, oblivious
for JUST a moment. It doesn't take long for his brain to calculate that
his hair is smouldering.
"Graaaaaaaaah!"
Luckily he finds an innocent civilian to put it out with. ...just
kidding. He dunks his head in a puddle, one that miraculously survived
all teh fire being thrown around. Standing back up, muddy water
dripping down his face, he snarls. "Pulling the fire trick up again,
pipsqueak? What did I just get through TELLING you?" Taking another
deep breath, this time Bowser settles for a barrage of smaller
firebals, as opposed to one big one. Get moving plumber, these things
are speedy.
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Fire Ball Blast attack!
Mario smiles innocently at Bowser's slight mishap. Then, as he comes
under fire from a stream of fireballs, he leaps up, he leaps right, he
leaps left, he leaps out of the way of every last one. "You were-a
saying that your-a fire is-a better than-a mine?" he jokingly reminds
the koopa. Then, he once again charges at Bowser, but not leaping this
time. Instead, he leaves that until he's within arms reach of the King,
before putting his jumping powers to use as one hell of an uppercut.
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
Jump + Punch = This Didn't Happen In A Game attack!
"HUWARRGH!" Bowser roars in frustration. "Stop rubbing it in, you
little shrimp!" Mario may have been off his game earlier, but now it
seems the tables are turning on the Koopa King. The uppercut he just
took to the jaw only adds injury to insult.
Or.. something.
Bowser goes flying back a few feet, landing on his back, but manages to
spin over onto his feet. He's not going to let it end this way, not
AGAIN. "Don't get full of yourself, Mario! I'm not through yet!"
Slamming his fists into the ground, he sends a shockwave towards the
overall-clad hero, which erups through the ground in the form of a
giant stone spire at Mario's feet. Ouch.
King Bowser strikes Mario with his
Crusher attack!
Spikey things aren't healthy. Not at all. Especially if they're big and
made of rock. Mario only barely avoids being skewered by the pillar,
but it catches on his overalls, dragging him up with it. Now that is
one hell of a wedgie. Eventually, the fabric rips, and Mario tumbles
down the rock until he lands, rather unceremoniously, on the ground.
Pulling himself back up, and now minus a seat in his overalls, he takes
out his ultimate weapon...
No, not the Hammer Suit, a /wrench/! You know, one of those that you
can tighten or slacken as you need it to. Not taking a run up this
time, Mario just leaps right for Bowser, and right over him once more.
Grabbing the tail? Nope. The leg? Nope. But what Mario does do is
almost pure evil. Taking the wrench, he tightens it on the very tip of
Bowser's tail. That is, if the koopa gives him the chance.
Mario misses King Bowser with his 101
Uses For Wrenches #45, Causing Pain attack!
Bowser can't help but laugh as Mario lands without his usual grace.
"Gwaha! Take THAT!" He amuses himself with this for a bit, until he
sees Mario leaping back at him. And jumping behind him again, how
PREDICTABLE.
"STOP GRABBING AT MY TAIL, TAIL-GRABBER!" Honestly, the same old
schtick gets old after awhile, even for Bowser. This time there's no
grand attempt to shake Mario off. Bowser figures Mario is going for the
tail so as soon as Mario lands behind him Bowser quickly spins around,
hoping to slap Mario in the face with his spiked appendage.
King Bowser strikes Mario with his
Tail Slap attack!
Big muscular scaly tails don't go well with plumber's faces. Thankfully
for Mario, he doesn't get the spikes, just a really painful smack. He
loses contact with the floor for a moment, before skidding and banging
his head on something, which stops the skid. Standing up, he realises
what it is he's collided with...the barbecue! Leaping up, he quickly
grabs his (very burnt) pasta he was cooking and downs it in one gulp.
He then gets a not too pleasant look on his face and looks a bit
groggy. Eating bad tasting food that fast isn't pleasant, but it still
fills a hole.
Mario restores Mario with his Pasta
Power minor healing!
Mario strikes Mario with his Bad
Pasta defense-decreasing attack!
Yes! Another hit! The King is on a roll! Gwahaha! "Give it up and go
home, squirt! You can't beat me now! You--" Huh, HEY! No stopping the
fight for a snack! Not fair!
"Stuffing your face a time like THIS, Mario? You glutton!" But, he can
see that Mario has been put-off by something. Whatever it is, Bowser
isn't gonna waste this chance. He starts charging towards Mario,
full-throttle. "I HAVE YOU NOW!" No fancy attacks. No weapons. No fire.
Just Bowser's massive form vs Mario's considerably smaller one. Just
pretend Bowser is a football player and Mario's the Waterboy.
Or... the other way around, depending on which movie this is.
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Full-on Collision attack!
Despite being a bit dizzy, Mario can still see Bowser lunging at him.
Then again, it's not hard to not see
something that big. Mario tries to dive out of the way, but it ends up
being more of a stumble-fall. But, the effect is the same, he still
gets out of the way, even if it was with less grace. He's still not
feeling brilliant, but still he winds up a punch and lets loose on
Bowser, who's probably crushed the barbecue or something.
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
Ker-Punch weak attack!
Why, yes, Bowser went straight into a barbecue. However any damage he
suffered was negated by scarfing down the contents of the grill, so it
all balances out! Mm, meaty.
He stands up just in time to see Mario's fist flying for his face,
though. And he couldn't duck out of the way in time. That's gonna ruin
his streak. Boo. However, Bowser isn't one to pass up taking advantage
of a good thing. With Mario's close proximity, that leaves the plumber
wide-open for his fire-breath! There's no easy escape this time, Mario,
so say hello to Bowser's belly fire!
King Bowser strikes Mario with his
Burp. Spicy. attack!
"Mama MIAAAAAA!!" Mario screams as he is very promptly set alight. This
should provide Bowser with a good laugh for awhile. Mario starts
running around in a panicky circle, the flames spreading from his cap
down to his overalls. His 'stache remains uncharged, such is it's
mythical power. Before anymore damage is done, Mario makes a beeline
for the pond, before diving in with steam rising from his impact point.
Climbing out, albeit very soggy, he tries to squeeze as much water as
he can out of his charred cap. "Bowser, it's-a time you left!" No-one
wrecks the hat. No-one.
But Mario isn't going to get revenge for the hat. Oh no, the hat's
going to do that. Grabbing his cap from his head, Mario literally
throws it at Bowser like a frisbee. It might not seem like much,
considering it's soft and comfy, but caps in the Mushroom Kingdom are
crazy little things.
Mario misses King Bowser with his Cap
Wars 5: The Caps Strike Back attack!
Bowser DOES get a good laugh from Mario's plight. Though, the general
thought of Mario in pain is sure to give him a chuckle. "Gwahahah! That
frantic running around ALWAYS cracks me up." That reminds him, he needs
more lava hazzards in his castle. Hahaha!
As Mario slogs out of the lake, though, Bowser frowns. "Stay down,
darnit! Grah! You're like a cockroach!" Bowser has some oddly quick
reflexes, though, as his hand darts up to catch Mario's hat as he
flings it at him.
Waitaminute.
Mario's HAT? "G'huh?" He blinks, looking down at his hand. "Gwahaha!"
He laughs, squeezing it tightly, causing some of the remaining water to
drop out of it. "I got'yer hat now, Mario!" Bowser snorts, and to
REALLY tick Mario off, Bowser places it upon his own oversized head. It
barely fits, though, resting more on his hair, than his scalp. "NOW
let's see how the tides turn, eh?" He laps into the air, diving at
Mario. And just tick Mario off JUST a bit more, he shouts "HERE WE
GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Copycat Slam Attack attack!
Mario looks on worriedly as Bowser grabs the hat. No
the smartest move he's ever done. Because Mushroom Kingdom caps are
crazy, Mario suddenly feels a little weak at the knees without his
favorite cap, his brown hair clearly exposed to the world. He steps
back slightly as the koopa dives at him, but at just the last second,
he leaps up. Maybe over Bowser, maybe landing on his head. Either way,
he makes a desperate grab for his hat as he flies through the air.
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
Hat-Reclamation and Stomping attack!
Tumble Tumble Tumble Thud SPLASH.
Well that put out Bowser's fire. Or... temporarily, anyway. Bowser
loses the hat AND lands in the lake. He doesn't stay under for long,
though, as he quickly leaps back out, landing at the water's edge.
"THAT DOES IT!" He screams, throwing his own version of a hissy fit.
"I'll /flatten/ ya!"
Snapping his fingers the Klown Koptor, which was hovoring over head,
turns upside down, dropping a few large, heavy, balls onto the park.
Bowser's aim isn't that great, though, but he can only HOPE he manages
to nail Mario with at least ONE of em.
King Bowser misses Mario with his
Goodness gracious Great Balls of... attack!
Uh-oh, here comes trouble. The Koptor is the stupidest looking
thing that defies all logic, but it still exists. As the hail of steel
balls comes forth, Mario starts leaping over them, trying to get to
Bowser. But, he ends up getting stuck atop one of them, and his frantic
running seems to actually make the ball go the other way...towards
Bowser
Mario strikes King Bowser with his
Circus Trick weak attack!
King Bowser has been knocked out!
Bowser is unable to get out of the way fast enough, as Mario
unexpectedly turns his attack against him. "Hey! No fair using one of
my own weapons!" This is the last thing he gets to say, though, as
Mario collides with the Koopa King, sending him flying into the sky,
ala Super Smash Brothers. As he's ascending he collides with his Klown
Koptor, and they BOTH go flying away into the stratopshere. Where they
land? Who knows. Probably on something jagged. All that can be heard
before they fade into the distance is a muted:
"Fungah! Foiled again!"
As the ball collides with Bowser, Mario falls off the top, landing in
the lake again. He's burnt, soggy, and bruised. But at least he's still
here. He looks over the park, it's not a pretty sight. But then
something rumbles: his belly. Hungry? Nope. It's that pasta, come back
to haunt him. Without a word, he runs for all he's worth to the
toilets...on the far side of the park. A muted cry can be heard within;
"Mama mia..." Sounds like they both had a bad day.
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